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March 2018



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I'm really bad at engineering.

In my most recent dream I was camping at the (Starwood like) Pagan Festival that is always going on in my dreamscape. I spent a lot of the dream trying to rig a tarp by tying a cord to other tents. Everything kept collapsing. I'm a really bad engineer in real life too. I was staying in a really big long tent with lots of people sleeping on the ground.

When I wasn't trying to rig a tarp I was running from one end of the festival to the other trying to avoid the organizers because I hadn't paid to get in.

There was a shuttle bus that would drive you from one end of the festival to the other. The front end of the festival had a lot of wooden buildings for merchant booths. At one point while I was passing through a building I went down a metal slide into an area set aside for the armorer. There was an old woman there who tried to give me some advice.

At first people assumed I had paid because they knew me, then they assumed that I was in a scholarship program, then word got back that I wasn't in any program and hadn't paid so I grabbed my stuff and left before they could kick me out. They banned me from the festival too.


That's a sucky dream!
Yes, there was a lot of free floating anxiety and frustration.

But I was actually enjoying myself most of the time.

I'm dealing with a lot issues around "what do I really want" right now. It's not as easy as some people seem to think it is. I want lots of things in varying degrees. And many of them are incompatible.
I can understand that. *hugs*